I'm sorry to break your heart but you can't wish things into reality

There is this recently trending belief system that by pretending to be something, with time you become it. The mentality is that you can be happy, or become confident if you pretend like you are and believe your own fiction until it becomes reality. This idea is best captured in the pervasive and ridiculous "Fake it, till you make it" mantra.

According to this funny belief system, you could laugh away your sorrows, stand up to your challenges, dare to do things you are afraid of, all merely by pretending. All you need to do is pretend you are already in that state and boom, after some time, you will be the person of your own dream.

Well, I'm about to burst that nonsensical bubble. I'm about to stick a pin in this ludicrous balloon before it goes any further or flies any higher.

It is absurd. Absolutely so. Problems don't go away because you wish them to. Issues don't disappear just because you wish they did. If that was the case, we won't need to do any work. We won't need to make any efforts. We would just sleep in our beds, fold our arms and wish things into reality. We won't have to go to work. But that's not the case because wishes are just what they are: wishes. Nothing more.

Your problems and challenges don't go away by you pretending to move on, by you assuming you are better off when you don't think about them, by veining a solution you don't have. Wake up from that reverie of the possibility of actually wishing things away. It's a ridiculous line of thought, a stupid way of trying to dodge the harsh truth of having to facing reality. Stop fooling yourself already please!

It like you imagining you have $30 billion in your bank account when all you have is the minimum balance. The reality is that you are not rich even if you pretend or wish to be for months or even eons. Reality is harsh. But forced false hope is harsher. Attempting to wish your problems away will only land you in bigger problems. To pretend something does not exist does not make it not exist, and to wish something that's non-existing exists does not make it exist.

If you want to be happy, face and defeat your sorrows. If you want to be confident address your timidity. If you want to to be rich, first break free of poverty. If you want success, put in the work. It's that straightforward.

A great physicist once said: "Nothing happens until something moves". That's just the bitter truth, the incontestable fact. It's one of the fundamental laws of the universe and there are NO exceptions to it. You have to do to become. There's no way around it. And mind you, wishing doesn't qualify as doing. Wishing is what it is – wishing. 

Nothing stems out of ordinary wishing. Wishing all by itself is null. Until wishes graduate into desires, they don't materialize into anything tangible because they lack the capacity to do so. There's a marked difference between a wish and a desire. The proof of desire is pursuit. If you desire something, you pursue it until you achieve it. You won't achieve anything by pretending you have achieved it. No! It doesn't work that way. It never did and it never will.

Even in magic, you can't just wish things into reality. You have to chant a spell or use magical potions for things to come into being, for things to happen. A germination cannot occur when there's no seed in the ground. Even for miracles to happen, something must be done.

You can't wish money into your bank account. You can't become happy or healthy by pretending to be. You can only make things happen by making deliberate efforts towards making them happen. No buts or maybes. No exceptions.

Make no mistake. I'm not speaking against believing in your dreams coming true and holding in your mind the picture of what you want or who you want to be in the future while striving towards same. That's a necessary prerequisite for attaining success. What I'm against is the crass idea that you can wish your lofty dreams into reality.

Let me know your opinion on the matter. Leave your comments below or send a mail to williams@olaidozen.ng.com to initiate a conversation.